Relationships are an inevitable part of life. You're always going to have people that you interact with on a daily (or at least regular) basis.
If you have a significant other, you can improve your relationship by learning about your and their primary love language. Of course, friends, and family can benefit from knowing this information as well, but it shines in romantic relationships.
But what are love languages and how can you use them to benefit your relationships with friends, family, or romantic partners?
What Are Love Languages?
The book that started it all is called The 5 Love Languages and is written by Dr. Gary Chapman. In the book, he lists out the five primary love languages we, as humans, use to show our affection and compassion for one another.
- Words of Affirmation: This includes spoken affections, like compliments, praise, or any other kind of verbal appreciation.
- Quality Time: This is simply time you spend with someone where you have their completely undivided attention and are just spending time bonding. Quality time could be sitting on the couch watching a movie together or it could be sitting outside on the porch talking until midnight.
- Physical Touch: Hugging, kissing, holding hands, or showing any other physical sign of affection is representative of this love language.
- Acts of Service: This could include doing the dishes, taking your partner's car in for an oil change, or just doing anything nice for someone when it's not expected of you.
- Receiving Gifts: This love language isn't just about loving presents, but it's loving the thought that went into the present, whether it's a well-thought-out birthday present or a random present of a candy bar that someone picked up at the store for you.
Although everyone uses each of these five love languages regularly throughout life, we typically have a primary love language or one that is our most preferred way for others to show us that they love and care about us.
The best way to learn about your love language is by using the Love Nudge app.
Download: Love Nudge for Android | iOS (Free)
Taking the Quiz in Love Nudge
The first thing you do in Love Nudge is take the quiz to find out what your main love language is and see what percentages each language gets.
There are only 30 questions, so it's a pretty short quiz and you should be finished in about 15 to 30 minutes, depending on how much time you devote to your answers. Each question has you finish a sentence that starts with "It's more meaningful to me when...," giving you two answers to choose from.
As soon as you finish, you'll be able to see your results and start learning more about your primary love languages.
Using Love Nudge to Improve Your Relationship
Once you know your love language, it's time to start improving your romantic relationship. A mistake that a lot of people make in relationships is trying to show affection for someone the way you want them to show affection for you. When you know each other's love languages, however, you know exactly how they want to be loved.
For example, consider that Person 1's primary love language is Quality Time and Person 2's primary love language is Words of Affirmation. Person 2 may shower Person 1 with compliments and say "I love you" all the time, but never spend long periods of time just hanging out with them.
While Person 1 may appreciate the compliments, they would feel much more loved and cared for if Person 2 would treat them to a night out at a restaurant or maybe play a board game at home.
And while love languages shine in romantic relationships, the same idea can be applied to relationships with family and friends.
For example, maybe you buy your mom a lavish gift every year for her birthday, but her primary love language is actually Acts of Service; she would probably be a lot happier if you showed up at her house and did some chores for her or fixed something broken around the house.
If you need ideas, Love Nudge has you covered. You can create goals using ideas that they've created or you can create custom goals once you get the idea of what types of things are associated with each love language.
Take the Quiz and Find Out Your Love Language
Now all that's left is to take the quiz! It's a super fun experience and it's cool to learn about how your brain works when it comes to preferences of love and affection.
And once you learn your and your partner's love languages, you can start loving them exactly how they want to be loved. Whether you end up taking them out on date night every week, taking care of chores that aren't typically yours, or surprising them with a kiss, learning each other's love languages can only spice things up.
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